10 Pieces of Mom Advice [you can actually use]
It seems like just yesterday I found out I was expecting my first child. I can still remember all the emotions I felt when I saw the positive pregnancy test. I was going to be a mom! What have I gotten myself into!?
Fast forward 4 years and here I am with 3 pregnancies under my belt and 3 children to tuck in bed at night. God is good!
For me with every pregnancy there was a season of worry. “Will I be a good mother?” “Will I have enough love for 2 kids?” “How am I going to raise 3 kids!?”.
With each pregnancy I always got the same “advice”…
“Enjoy the sleep while you can!” (What pregnant women sleeps well anyway!?)
“Put a little cereal in her bottle so she sleeps longer” (Um, no thank you)
“You have to buy a mamaroo, its the best invention ever!” (No it’s not)
The list goes on and on….
So I wanted to offer some tips that are actually helpful. A list for first time moms and seasoned moms. Advice with some truth to it. Some grit. Some REALITY.
This is the advice I wish people had gave me while I was pregnant.
1. Freeze Meals before baby arrives
Unless you can stomach a solid week of take-out….Do yourself (and your wallet) a favor and freeze some meals ahead of time. I didn’t do this with my first 2 pregnancies, but I really wish I had. It’s just one less thing to worry about. I still like to have some freezer meals on hand just in case I have one of those “bad days”. (See Tip #5)
2. The other “Two Week Wait”
Tell friends & family to pump the breaks. Your mom coming to help out is one thing. All day visitors and constant company? Do yourself a favor and set some boundaries. Babys don’t stay little for long, and the first couple weeks home with your new baby should be cherished between you and your husband.
3. Sleep when baby sleeps…sometimes
Baby’s sleep a lot in the beginning. Grab a couple naps when you can but don’t forget naps are a good opportunity to spend time with your husband, to take a quick shower or eat a hot meal. These things will help you feel less like a “mombie” and more like yourself.*
*If this is not your first baby scratch this and opt for coffee…there’s no napping when you have multiple children!
4. Everyone will have an opinion….none of them will matter
Time to get tough skin. Everyone is going to have an opinion about the choices you make as a mom and everyone will think that their way is the best way…just ignore it. As long as you and your husband are on the same page, who really cares what other people think.
5. On the bad days…drop everything
They’re going to happen. My goodness are they going to happen! Don’t try to be super mom on these days. Forget about everything else you were supposed to do and just survive. Your spouse is not going to judge you if the kids are still in jammies and there’s leftovers for dinner. Just remember, it’s a bad day not a bad life.
6. Take Care of Yourself
Think of your pre baby days (I know I know, it’s a far distant memory) what were some things you liked to do? For me it’s little things like, putting makeup on, enjoying a glass of tea on the porch, reading a book or exercising. I try every day to do something little for myself. It goes a long way. Taking care of yourself mentally and physically is important. For not just you…but your family too.
7. Don’t forget to hang your Mom hat up
Rather it’s your new baby, your toddler, your older child or all of the above. Kids demand a lot of time. However, don’t push your marriage aside for your kids. Put the kids to bed, hang up your Mom hat and go enjoy the company of your spouse. It’s amazing how God can use your husband to replenish your soul after a long day. Your husband will value the time spent together and in return your kids will benefit from it as well.
8. There’s no wrong way to “mom”
Co-sleeping vs crib sleeping. Bottle vs breast. Stroller vs carrier. Blah blah blah. I’m not sure when the mom shaming thing started but I don’t remember it being an issue when I had my first child (2013). I also don’t understand why women have become so divided in the realm of motherhood. Either way, there is no wrong way to mom. Whatever you choose for your child should be what is best for YOUR baby. Don’t give in to the mom guilt, follow your instincts and be proud of your choices.
9. Mind your own motherhood
Once you’ve found your knack for motherhood, you’re going to see a lot of other moms things differently than you would….and you’re going to have opinions…
You don’t need that kind of karma.
10. Put The Phone Down
What’s that saying?
“The days are long but the years are short”?
There’s never been a more truer statement for motherhood. Savor it. Take it all in. Even the bad days. They grow up so fast. The newborn phase is gone in the blink of an eye. The first year is a whirlwind of emotions and milestones. And time just seems to excelorate as your family grows. Take time to unplug. There is no form of social media that will ever be more important than your child. So put the phone down or schedule social media time if you have to…but don’t miss out on all the little moments with your child because you’re reading about someone else’s online.
I hope these tips help shine some light on motherhood. I hope they reminded you seasoned moms out there, that while some days are hard…most days are good!! Crazy, wonderful and GOOD!